Ever since COVID ended, so did work from home (WFH) for many, and it was replaced with the less desirable and unnecessary RTO or return to office. Or in some cases “hybrid work”, which is a touch better than RTO. I was very fortunate to have quit my job during COVID and found a fully remote job that wasn’t just a passing fad or a bait and switch offer. However, many people were screwed into coming back to the office. I am going to provide my perspective on why WFH is just fine and maybe there is a group of people out there that need to just exit the work force already since they can’t comprehend that just because you cannot be seen does not mean you are slacking off. I have seen a number of incredibly shameful posts from a number of people, young and old, deciding that since they cannot tolerate WFH, they must ruin it for everyone by enforcing RTO.
Obviously this is a subjective topic, but since it’s from my perspective I have no problem with the following title being on this article.
Why you are all wrong
To every dope on social media, especially LinkedIn, you are all wrong. I can say this with the utmost confidence because your preferences are not the preferences of everyone else, and vice versa. I am not sure why this has to be explained to adults, but apparently it does.
If you don’t like working remotely, then don’t.
The childish temper tantrums I have seen from grown ass adults about this subject is maddening. It’s the equivalent of being upset at everyone who eats peanut butter and enjoys it. “I don’t enjoy peanut butter, therefore no one else is allowed to enjoy peanut butter.” You all sound like you are three years old. Go put yourself in timeout and think about how stupid you sound.
The real reasons companies want RTO
This is absolutely not rocket science. There are several reason RTO was/is being forced on workers:
- The employer is paying rent on an office building no one is inhabiting. Well we can’t allow that, it will make our ten year lease look like a foolish mistake to corporate and the C-Levels! Let’s lie to the employees and tell them it’s because we work better together in the office.
- Companies are well documented as using this as a way to get people to voluntarily quit since they were over-hiring during COVID. Instead of firing people or laying them off, it’s much cheaper to annoy people into quitting their jobs. This way companies do not have to pay severance or unemployment for those who qualify.
- The grey hairs running the company just can’t comprehend that anyone younger than them is actually doing their job unless they can be seen. Because they are old, stubborn, and can only think about “This is how we did it when I was coming up in my career.” Yes grandpa, and people used to use radium for consumer products and medical treatments from the 1910s until the 1930s because it was killing people. Just because, “That’s how you used to do it” doesn’t mean it’s automatically a good idea. The grey hairs on your head may contain some wisdom, but not for everything. Grow up.
- Some employees were actually taking advantage and slacking off. Shame on them, this is not representative of the majority. There is such a thing as a bad employee.
- Some employees were working multiple remote jobs and they should be sued for violating their contracts if their company has explicit clauses about not doing this. Again, not representative of all employees. This is a bad employee.
Anyways, this can be summed up by “Wahhhh I don’t like this and my diaper is moist!” – none of these things are a good reason to embark on collective punishment.
A few words to commercial property owners
I and so many other people like me have absolutely no interest in the well being of the commercial property market. It’s not my problem if the value of your commercial properties drop because no one wants to use them anymore. That’s called a free market. You took the risk, now you have to live with it. Apparently, it’s only okay for free market capitalism to be free and unregulated so long as the oligarchy gets exactly what they want. Boo hoo. Cry me a river.
Working in an office setting is incredibly unproductive
I worked in an office setting from 2009 until about 2020. I don’t miss it and I never want to go back.
I worked for most of my career so far as an individual contributor. There is nothing more unproductive than being surrounded by people who cannot stay at their own desks. I do not miss people walking up to me, “Just to say hi.” or “Hey you got a minute?” or “Hey let me interrupt what you are doing so I can tell you about something very unimportant.” – all of these things are distractions. The precise things that I would expect leadership to find unproductive. Here is a side by side comparison of all the things I don’t miss about working in an office versus working from home.
| Subject | Work from home | Working in the office |
|---|---|---|
| Commuting to and from work | – Zero miles – Reduced car wear – Reduced fuel usage – More sleep – Go to the gym – Reduced stress levels since there is no road rage to deal with – Actual commute is walking down the hallway – Actual commute away from work is walking out of your office – Go to bed on time | – Many miles greater than zero – Car wear – Increased fuel usage – Less sleep – Increased stress levels dealing with road rage incidents – Increased blood pressure – Loss of productivity due to time wasted on commute to and from work every day – You are tempted to skip the gym more often – You are exhausted when you get home – You have to de-stress and calm down from the commute – Don’t go to bed on time because you are stressed and you didn’t get to do anything for yourself today |
| Eating habits | – Fully prepared breakfast – Fully prepared lunch – Calm eating – Can turn off camera during meetings and eat lunch while listening | – Hassle of having to eat breakfast quickly to drive to work – Poor digestion – Missed meals – Frustrating eating – Lunch becomes a game of politics because you may feel pressured to eat with others – People make comments about you eating at your desk – “Let’s work through lunch” – “Let’s make it a lunch meeting” Everything listed here is a real cost to the company in the form of loss of productivity, and lowered employee morale. |
| Food facilities | – Personal kitchen – Personal coffee / tea maker – Quality coffee / tea ingredients – Personal refrigerator with ice and stocked fridge – Personal water source – Facility is as clean as you want it to be | – Shared kitchen – Low quality coffee / tea ingredients – Shared refrigerator with limited space, sometimes a smell, and office thief – Water source is far from desk – The water source’s filter needs to be replaced because the water is trickling slowly out now. It’s going to take a week for the maintenance company to come out with a new filter and to maintain the machine. – People demand ice – The ice maker stops working. Maintenance company takes a week to come out to fix the ice machine which keep breaking. – Facility is filthy as it’s “someone else’s problem” – “Someone stole my favorite mug!” – “The cleaning lady dropped and broke my bowl!” – “Oh god someone heated up fish!” – “All the microwaves are being used, guess I will wait for one to free up.” – “Oh no, the break flipped because all of the toasters and microwaves being used at the same time!” – “Let’s go to lunch” come back two hours later – “It has come to our attention that some people are taking more than their allotted one hour lunch time. Please keep it to an hour, or make up your lost time by the end of the day.” Everything listed here is a real cost to the company in the form of loss of productivity, maintenance, electricity, water, and supplies. |
| Lavatory | – Personal bathroom, so there is no line. – Bathroom is next to my office – No one is going to talk to me while I am on the toilet – You don’t have to smell or hear the person taking a dump next to you – Always has toilet paper – Has a bidet – You can take off your pants if you want to – You can even shower if you feel like it because why not – Stocked with soap and toilet paper – Calm bathroom time | – Shared restroom, so stalls may not be available. – If you are a woman, you use a key to get into your bathroom because some men are creepy – The bathroom is usually not anywhere close to your desk. You will be walking a bit to get there. Sometimes to another floor. – Oh god this toilet seat is warm… – Accidentally walking in on co-workers because this building’s idea of stalls is to use cardboard for walls and an ironing board for a door – “Hey, this stall occupied?” – “Hey, how much longer are you going to be?” – “Hey, we need you for this meeting” – You will be smelling everyone else’s exhausts – You will be hearing the trumpets of other people’s movements – No bidet! Now you have swamp ass or an itchy butt for the rest of the day – hooray! – The toilet paper is single ply and feels like sand paper – Sometimes there is no toilet paper or soap because the goddamned cleaning staff didn’t replace it yet – Can’t take off your pants – The floors are gross – No showers Everything here is a real cost to the company in the form of rent and sometimes cleaning staff contracts. |
| Office setup | – Standing desk of my choice – Nice chair of my choice – All my personal stuff within reach – Play my music as loud as I want and without head phones – My own decor – My things are safe because only I am here | – Have to ask for a standing desk to be purchased and will only be provided if it is approved. Sometimes requires a medical reason. They will buy whatever they want for you. – You get whatever chair they give you. – You may not be allowed to bring in your own chair because it won’t match all of the other chairs and that really bothers the CEO because he doesn’t have anything else better to do than judge looks – Rules about what can be hung up in your cubicle – You may not even have a cubicle because your CEO is an idiot and thought open floor plan made sense – Zero privacy – Music over headphones only – “Hey, we are going to need you to stop wearing headphones because we want you to be able to hear us when we call for you.” – Make sure you aren’t disturbing your neighbor – Why are you watching TV during work? – Why are you on your phone so much? – That one asshole in the office who thinks its absolutely appropriate to play church music at a low tone, so now you have to hear about jesus all fucking day long. – Someone stole <personal item> from my desk! Now management wants everyone to lock up their items every day in their filing cabinet. Everything here is a real cost to the company in the form of purchases, unnecessary construction costs, and lowered employee morale. |
| Fire drills | There are none | – Oh my god I am deaf and blind! This fucking thing is SO LOUD. – I was working on something really important! Not today! – “We noticed that some of you are not respecting the fire alarm and keep working. You can’t do that, but make sure to get your work done on time. Stay later if you have to.” – Another fire drill? I’m going home. – Okay let’s all go down stairs which takes like a full 20 to 30 minutes. – Okay the drill is over, let’s all pretend like we want to go back upstairs. Let’s talk in the parking lot for like an hour instead. – Some asshole put popcorn in the microwave and burned it! – Some asshole put something in the toaster oven and it caught on fire! Everything here is a real cost to the company in the form of loss of productivity, liabilities, fines, and lowered employee morale. |
| Office politics | – Limited to the length of a relay chat, email, or video meeting – Absolutely still openings for toxicity as this is a human problem, but also a company culture issue – Far less shit talking | – “Hey, why aren’t you coming out to lunch with us anymore?” – “Did you hear about Debra?” – The formation of toxic cliques and being left out because you are not one of the “cool kids” – The CEO wants everyone to have their shirts tucked in, because again apparently he doesn’t have anything better to do. – “What are you bringing to the pot luck?!” – “Instead of giving you all gift cards, we decided to take you away from your families for the evening, and blow a bunch of cash on going to a bowling alley!” – “How come you aren’t participating in the team activity? You aren’t being a team player!” – “Everyone else on the team is trying hard to win the match, but you aren’t” – “Let’s chant the morning mantra together about the company values. Which company value is your favorite?” Everything here is a real cost to the company in the form of loss of productivity, liabilities, risk of litigation, unnecessary costs, and lowered employee morale. |
| Dress code | – Tank top – T-shirt – Shorts – I am not wearing pants right now – Shoes are optional | – Company uniform – Slacks, polo, and oxfords – Slacks, button down, and oxfords – Shirts must be tucked in – Casual Friday! You can wear jeans! Until the CEO freaks out because it doesn’t look professional and apparently he doesn’t have anything better to do. – “I’m sorry Becky, we are going to have to ask you to go home today because everyone can see every crevice of your body in that onesie that you thought was work appropriate. No, just wearing a jacket to cover your front is not enough.” – “We received complaints about your T-Shirt. You can’t wear a shirt that says Crack Whore on it.” “My shirt said Krakow on it.” “Regardless, no more graphic tees.” (This actually happened to me) Everything here is a cost to the company in the form of loss of productivity, liabilities, risk of litigation, general discomfort, opportunities for sexual harassment, and lowered employee morale. |
| Sexual harassment | – My wife slapped my butt and I liked it – All joking aside, it can still happen obviously, but is far less likely to happen – You aren’t physically present with your attacker, so you are safer – You can screenshot and screen record offenders to provide to HR – Chats are logged | – He said / she said incidents when there are no recordings to consult. – Since employees are in person it’s much easier for men to leer at women and vice versa. – Being physically present means touching is possible – Having to share common spaces with problematic people, like a CIO who just can’t stop himself from sleeping with your female coworkers while cheating on his wife and two kids – Manager groping female subordinates while drunk at a team outing Everything here is a cost to the company in the form of loss of productivity, liabilities, risk of litigation, general discomfort, sexual harassment, potential loss of employees, and lowered employee morale. |
| Meetings | – I click a button to join a meeting – When the meeting is over I click a different button to leave the meeting – When the meeting is over, I am by myself, and I can take a breath before moving on to my next task – If I have to join another meeting, I just press a button – Meeting presentations are done with ease – Recording and sharing meetings are done with ease – “Oh no my internet died. Eh no big deal, I can watch the recording later.” | – “Oh I thought I booked this room, but it looks like there is someone else in it!” – “It has come to our attention that teams aren’t being timely about when their meetings have ended. We recommend you leave five minutes at the end of your meeting to leave so that the next team can walk in and setup right away.” – “Ah crap I forgot to book a room!” – The conference room is on another floor – The conference room is in a different building – The conference room is on the other side of the floor – “The Polycom isn’t working. Sometimes it overheats and you need to unplug it and plug it back in.” – “The Crestron panel isn’t working so I can’t turn on the projector.” – “I plugged in my laptop but it won’t show on the projector.” – “What’s the WiFi password?” – “Do you have an Ethernet cable I can use, WiFi isn’t working.” – “Do you have an power extension cable? My laptop won’t reach the plug.” – Disconnecting your laptop repeatedly from your dock in order to travel with your laptop, mouse, and coffee to another room. – Setting up your laptop, mouse, and coffee now that you took like five to ten minutes to get to your conference room. – “The last people to use this room didn’t erase the white board.” – “It has come to our attention that teams are not erasing the white boards after meetings. Please erase the white board before leaving. Thank you. Be considerate towards others.” – While making the trek “Oh no I dropped my coffee all over the carpet!” – When you have some people who are remote, “Our remote guests are saying they can’t hear us.” <fiddles with tech> “Can you hear us now? Still no? Okay we are going to call tech support.” proceed to wait minutes for someone to show up and troubleshoot. “Okay everyone, let’s change conference rooms.” Everything here is a cost to the company in the form of loss of productivity, monumental amounts of time wasted, liabilities, general discomfort, lowered employee morale, conference equipment inventory & repairs, tech support costs, conference room scheduling conflicts |
| Mental health | – Bullying can still happen obviously, but is far less likely to happen – You aren’t physically present with your attacker, so you are safer – You can screenshot and screen record offenders to provide to HR – Chats are logged – Over all huge increase in mental health since interactions with people are time boxed – Excellent for people with problems with anxiety | Every single thing listed in this entire column is a drain on mental health for some people. – Being surrounded by people all day IS NOT healthy for some individuals. – Having panic attacks around others is not fun – Dealing with high anxiety around others puts you in a worse position – Snapping at people because they can’t understand that you just need to be left alone ends you up with everyone saying YOU are the problem. – “God why don’t you ever smile?” – “Why are you so negative all of the time?” – “You are not a team player” – “Why are you so weird?” – “You need to stop being so sensitive” – No reprieve from the “mean girls” or bullies – No space to just breath Everything here is a cost to the company in the form of loss of productivity, liabilities, risk of litigation, general discomfort, harassment, bullying, potential loss of employees, and lowered employee morale. |
| Productivity and focus | Every single thing listed in this column increases productivity and focus – The ability to turn off alerts and just focus – No walk ups – No small talk – No immediate “Hey got a minute?” conversations – Quiet | – No ability to stop people from walking up to you and interrupting you every five minutes. – No ability to stop small talk from people who are looking for a distraction. – “Hey got a minute?” turns into an hour long distraction helping others. – Noise – Having to listen to other people run meetings or take business phone calls Everything here is a cost to the company in the form of loss of productivity, monumental amounts of time wasted, general discomfort, lowered employee morale, and potential loss of employees |
| Multitasking | – Wash my dishes – Run a load of laundry – Run an errand – Go for a walk – Pick up the kids from school – Drop the kids off at school | – Nope – “It has come to our attention that some individuals are running errands during company hours. Please use your provided PTO for this or please make up the hours at the end of the day” – “It has come to our attention that some individuals are taking walks during company hours. Please use your lunch hour for this or please make up the hours at the end of the day” Everything here is a cost to the company in the form of lowered employee morale |
As far as I can tell, every single thing I have listed above is a cost to the company in some way. I do acknowledge that it’s still important to have a face to face sometimes. I have a face a face about once a year and I think that’s plenty. Everything about being in person is less productive when getting actual work done is involved. The value of in person meetings is discussing long term plans and some team building exercises.
I have been working remotely for about 7 years and it has only been a boon for me. I never want to return to an office full time. I refuse.
Everyone one of you dopes who advocates for permanent RTO, go do it if that makes you happy, but leave people like me out of it. There are very few upsides to in-office work. You all are just outdated. Leave the work force. Especially you fossils out there. Make room for the younger generations so they can fix what you have broken.
Saying the obvious
It’s obvious that WFH only favors people who can work on a laptop for 100% of their job. This is obvious, but I am just saying it for that one person who is going to say, “Yeah well I can’t WFH because I deal with customers in person.” Okay, well sucks to be you I guess, not talking about you. I am not expecting a construction worker to WFH because that doesn’t make sense either. There are also matters of heightened security that require people to work inside of a secure facility. This is not lost on me. If you can’t, then you can’t.
Remote management
I have had clowns try to make the argument that managing people remotely is impossible. No it isn’t, you just don’t like WFH. If that’s the case, then don’t work at a remote company. I am a manager of six employees and I interact with plenty of people every day. I am telling you I don’t have a problem with managing any of my employees. And it may come as a shock to you, but I have a manager too, and they have a manager. We even have an entire C-suite that is remote. So again – this is a YOU problem. Stop trying to ruin this for everyone else.